summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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