we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
