So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize