you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize
