I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
