My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize