you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
