Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
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