but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize
