I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
