they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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