yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.