Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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