If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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