I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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