The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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