I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.