did you get engaged???
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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