"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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