I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
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he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
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I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
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