Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize