he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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