i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
