If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
