So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize