you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
