Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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