Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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