Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
