Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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