I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
