i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Randomize
