I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
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