Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Randomize
