She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
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