I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
