I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
