im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Randomize