ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
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