Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
