Me. At least after what I've been through.
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
