im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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