I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
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