How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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