I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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