I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
