You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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