he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I just burned my penis
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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