I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
