i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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