i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
