GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
